TOP TEN LEAST FAVORITE HULK STORIES
Welcome, one and all, to the first ever LEAST FAVORITES list!
The idea of doing a "Least Favorites" list comes courtesy of longtime friend and true blue supporter of Blood Work, Chris. Love you, buddy!
For those who don't know, The Incredible Hulk is my all time favorite comic book character, super hero, and perhaps even literary figure. I love the Hulk! I have loved him since I was in single digits watching the Bill Bixby/Lou Ferrigno television show in syndication. My collection of Hulk comic books comprises the largest portion of my comic book collection. I nearly have them all, if you can believe it! After having read the stories of this character for most of my life, I've developed preferences in terms of the Hulk's portrayal. There are areas of the Hulk lore that I absolutely adore, areas which are okay, areas that are forgettable, and areas I loathe (which is worse than forgettable).
Like the title says, this is a list of my least favorite Hulk stories. The stories here range from dislike to utter hatred. Let me state that, though I may not like these stories, I am in no way saying that these stories are in fact "bad." Some of these stories are mere victims of circumstance. Some are growing pains of the story, necessary development of the character. And some, I daresay, are in fact purposefully different to explore new territory. Sometimes these writers are allowed complete autonomy and sometimes they're dictated what to write.
The intent of this list isn't to bash anything or belittle the hard work of others. What lies beneath is a list of my own opinions and nothing more.
WARNING! WARNING! BEWARE! TURN BACK NOW!
Shh! Quiet!
'Haha' nevermind that... just a fair word of warning... I start off rational and collected before descending into madness by the end of this...
Enjoy!
THE BONUS
#11
BENDIS HULK
Brian Michael Bendis is one of comicdom's super star writers. God's gift to comic books, some might even say. He sells comic books just because his name is on them, not necessarily because of the characters or content therein. For a long while Bendis was Marvel Comics' number one writer. Marvel basically handed him the keys to the kingdom and said, "Do whatever you want." At least it seemed that way to me. He wrote every Marvel character under the sun or just about. But he very seldom wrote the Hulk.
For the longest time I wondered why Bendis wasn't writing Hulk. It grew downright suspicious after a while. All these big events were happening, many orchestrated by Bendis, and Hulk was nowhere to be found. Or when the big Hulk events were happening, Bendis was nowhere to be found. "What gives, Bendis? Hulk not good enough for you?" I'd ask myself. I started realizing that Bendis' stories wouldn't work if Hulk was there. Hulk would save the day immediately and Bendis would have nothing to write. Hulk was too powerful for most of Bendis' stories. So it seemed, for a good number of years, Marvel cleverly side-lined Hulk from the main universe through various means to accommodate Bendis.
But after Marvel Studios' AVENGERS hit movie theaters in 2012, Bendis could no longer ignore the Hulk. He wrote Hulk in the little AVENGERS ASSEMBLE book, meant originally to be an out-of-continuity fun for all ages book that was congruent with the movie in terms of character roster. Then Bendis wrote Hulk into the AVENGERS VS X-MEN event. Hulk shows up as the Avenger's secret weapon against the X-Men at the eleventh hour, only to be schooled immediately after. Then Bendis wrote him in 2016's CIVIL WAR II in which Hulk's only purpose was to die. Yep, Bendis killed Hulk.
Long story short, the Hulk may be the only Marvel character Bendis dislikes. I didn't realize it, but Bendis not writing Hulk was a blessing in disguise. Alright, this isn't quite fair as Bendis never wrote a proper Hulk book, but every time he touched Hulk the results were terrible. That is unless you yourself hate the Hulk, in which case you'd probably want Bendis to write more with the Hulk.
So, all ranting aside, this is a bonus because Bendis barely wrote an actual Hulk story. But had he written a proper Hulk solo book, I can only imagine how terrible it would be. No, I know I'd hate it.
THE TOP TEN
#10
EARLY STAN LEE HULK
Incredible Hulk Vol. 1 #1 - #6, Tales To Astonish Vol. 1 #59 - #89 (May 1962 to March 1967)
Stan Lee and Jack Kirby created the Hulk. These guys get a pass as without them we wouldn't even have Bruce Banner/Hulk at all. But reading the early Hulk stories is rough. Believe it or not, Hulk, for the first several years of his existence, wasn't like the Hulk we know today. The Hulk's character was very much in flux, a work in progress for many years. He first appeared in 1962 but it wouldn't be until about 1967-68 when Stan Lee would finally nail down Hulk's now iconic persona.
The first five years of Hulk's comic career were fraught with "growing pains." Hulk was simpleminded but mean and almost straight up villainesque. He began as gray skinned, his transformations occurring at night, not by anger. Then with more gamma experimenting Hulk mutated many times, one of these mutations featured Banner's head atop Hulk's body, in which Banner wore a Hulk mask to look normal.
I thank Stan Lee and Jack Kirby for creating Hulk and especially Stan Lee for sticking it out for years trying to make Hulk work. Stan didn't give up on the Hulk and worked at it and worked at it until finding the Hulk we recognize today. But, man, those early stories are so very rough and strange. As a HUGE Hulk fan, I'd only recommend those early Hulk stories for the curious minded or the comic historians among us.
With Tales to Astonish #90, the first appearance of the Abomination, the Hulk story really gets going and finds its stride.
#9
PLANET HULK
WHAT?! PLANET HULK?! WHAT THE HELL, MAN?! THIS IS THE GREATEST HULK STORY EVER! YOU AIN'T A HULK FAN UNLESS YOU LOVE PLANET HULK!
I know, I know! Stop yelling at me already! I like Planet Hulk, I do! It's just not one of my favorites. Let me explain: Not long before this story saw print, I was deep diving the Hulk back issues like no other. The 300's and up were especially fresh in my memory as those are among my very favorite eras of Hulk books. Incredible Hulk #300 ends with Hulk being exiled from planet Earth by Dr. Strange and the other heroes. Hulk is exiled to The Crossroads, an inter-dimensional nexus to an assortment of other planets and realities where Hulk could do no harm nor be harmed (in theory). In one issue Hulk goes to a planet populated by red skinned people ruled by an evil king. At one point Hulk arrives, his vast power severely weakened, and ends up in bondage. Sound familiar? These stories were written by Bill Mantlo, a long time scribe on Hulk.
Later, I would discover that Planet Hulk's writer, Greg Pak, knows Hulk's history very well. Pak even cited Bill Mantlo's run as being tremendously influential on his own run. While I was reading Planet Hulk I was thinking to myself, "I've just read this already. This isn't anything new. This Greg Pak guy is just telling the same old Hulk story Bill Mantlo told, only dragging it out WAY too long." Oh yeah, and Planet Hulk is just Edgar Rice Burrough's JOHN CARTER series all over again too. Hell, Marvel even did their own adaptation of John Carter too! There is nothing new or special about Planet Hulk at Marvel at all it seems!
I guess I'm coming at Planet Hulk from a unique perspective. For those who haven't read Bill Mantlo's Hulk run or the John Carter of Mars books (or Marvel's John Carter adaptation), Planet Hulk is probably a revelation of comic book storytelling. In popular culture nowadays the only Hulk stories that matter, so they say, are Planet Hulk and World War Hulk. And my god, is that a shame because, man, Planet Hulk, to me, is nothing special and nowhere even close to Hulk's finest hour.
For the record, I like it. I think it's written well and the art is fantastic. But it's nothing new in terms of plot (John Carter). Nor is it particularly unique to the Hulk series either (Bill Mantlo did it in Hulk already way back when!). And it started Hulk down my least favorite era in Hulk history...
Planet Hulk is a great gateway story to Hulk comics, but, in my opinion, doesn't come close to the best Hulk stories.
#8
WORLD WAR HULK
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU, MAN?! FIRST PLANET HULK AND NOW THIS?! IS NOTHING SACRED TO YOU?! YOU'RE NOT A HULK FAN! YOU WOULDN'T KNOW A GOOD HULK STORY IF IT KICKED YOU IN THE BALLS!
Whoa. Whoa... calm down. I like World War Hulk. Just like I like Planet Hulk. Just because these stories are on this list doesn't mean I hate them. It just means I don't like them as much as I like others. Now, with that out of the way...
Remember those Hulk back issues in the 300's? Yeah, the issues I just talked about which closely resemble Planet Hulk? Well, guess what happened when Hulk returned to Earth after being exiled to the Crossroads? He fought all of the super heroes! NO WAY?!
Yeah, if the parallels to Bill Mantlo's work and that era of Hulk comics weren't overt enough for you... Here's more! My God, Greg Pak was literally retelling Incredible Hulk #300 through #322. And what's worse is John Romita Jr's art. Now take all of this as my opinion only, but, man, I do not like John Romita Jr's art circa this period of his career. At least Planet Hulk had great artwork while retelling the same old story. World War Hulk gets double whammied because, not only is it another retread story (in sequential order from the last retread), but now the art is worse (again, just my personal art preference). You have these amazing covers by David Finch and these ugly crude interiors by JR JR.
I was excited for this because Hulk had never been elevated to such a status in Marvel, starring in his own company wide event no less! But the actual product itself... was lacking. And it all ends with the revelation that the heroes weren't to blame and Hulk just ruined the Marvel universe for nothing, in fact, becoming everything he feared he would be. Thanks, Greg. Thanks for proving Iron Man and the other heroes right for exiling Hulk in the first place.
So, Marvel, you just retold Hulk's exile and Hulk's return and battle against the heroes. Why not continue down this retread road and bring in a different colored Hulk next?! Oh wait... ARE YOU KIDDING ME?! A THIRD RETREAD?! IN THE EXACT SAME ORDER AS IT WAS ORIGINALLY?! AND THIS DIFFERENT COLORED HULK IS A JERK TOO?!
Sorry, I started seeing RED. More on that later...
Wow, after lambasting two of Greg Pak's Hulk stories (his two biggest Hulk stories in fact), you'd think I don't like Greg Pak's Hulk at all. NOT TRUE! I actually really like Greg Pak's Hulk run. I really enjoy Pak's run on Hulk #601-635. I think Greg Pak is one of the best Hulk writers of recent years, Planet Hulk and World War Hulk just happen to be my least favorite sections of his Hulk writing career.
#7
POST ONSLAUGHT HULK
Incredible Hulk Vol. 1 #444 - #467 (August 1996 to August 1998)
As a rule, writer Peter David's work on the Hulk is by and far the greatest run/era in Hulk history, in my opinion. But it too has some low points. There was a point in Peter David's run where he was slowly fulfilling the prophecies established in The Incredible Hulk: Future Imperfect. Peter David was building towards something, something big.
Then Marvel Comics decides to conduct a mega event that would affect the entire Marvel line: ONSLAUGHT. Nearly every character would meet their end in the grand finale save for the X-Men and a few others. Bruce Banner was among the fallen... but not Hulk. Afterwards Marvel halfheartedly abandoned their original universe in favor of a new one: HEROES REBORN. In this new Marvel universe there was a new Hulk, not written by Peter David, and not exactly heroic either.
What Peter David had going prior to Onslaught was completely derailed post Onslaught. The intervening issues lose their charm and the stride he had for over one-hundred issues finally breaks. This is the moment where the entire volume descends towards its eventual cancellation. Despite some good artwork from Mike Deodato Jr. and Adam Kubert, the story bounces around from idea to idea. It never begins developing something bigger. Then there's the death of Betty, a result of Peter David working through his own personal life, namely a divorce.
This is where something once great falls apart.
#6
PAUL JENKINS' HULK RUN
Incredible Hulk Vol. 2 #12 - #28 (March 2000 to July 2001)
I don't have much to say about this section save for what it was attempting to unravel. The pinnacle of Peter David's run was the merging of Hulk's multiple personas into one composite being, the Professor Hulk.
Paul Jenkins begins his run by undoing all that work. This story introduces countless more personalities and even goes as far as to say that the Professor Hulk was no more than another of Bruce Banner's multiple personalities.
This may not be a bad story (I don't actually think any of these stories on this list are in fact "bad"), but it is disappointing to see elements of the Peter David's story dismantled like this. This is a list of my least favorite Hulk stories and this run just takes the story further away from what Peter David had built. Some may see it as a deepening of the mythology, and really that's what I should view it as. But I don't. I personally hold the Peter David Hulk run in regard like the X-Men fans regard the Chris Claremont run. Imagine reading a run on X-Men that actively eroded Claremont's narrative or reading a new Harry Potter book by a different author that broke apart J.K. Rowling's work. That's how I feel about this run.
It's really the Hulk fan in me that dislikes this story. After Peter David left the series in 1998 it would take another EIGHT YEARS before the Hulk series became "Good" again, in my opinion (and that was with the Planet Hulk story... wow, I am a hard person to please).
#5
JOE CASEY'S HULK RUN
Incredible Hulk Vol. 1 #468 - #474 (September 1998 to March 1999)
The run immediately following Peter David's departure. I harbor no ill will towards writer Joe Casey or any of the writers I've talked about here on the list. But it seems as if no one other than Peter David knows how to write the Hulk. And Greg Pak.
Joe Casey was merely an interim writer between Peter David and John Byrne. These issues are basically a study in "spinning your wheels." This section did contribute one element to the overall plot however, namely the identity of who actually killed Betty: THE ABOMINATION. The Abomination took a syringe of his gamma irradiated blood and injected it into Betty, effectively killing Betty for more than a decade.
I did not like this plot development one bit. It makes no sense. First off, there is no needle in the world that could penetrate the Abomination's skin. Second, Abomination had made a turn towards becoming an anti-hero (my personal favorite arc for Abomination). This "Revenge" play of poisoning Betty came out of nowhere and was extremely out of character for Abomination. And what's worse is that it would become Abomination's most well known exploit...
There are forgettable Hulk stories which aren't bad. And this section would've fallen into that category. But the bit with Abomination is why this section is among my least favorite Hulk stories.
#4
BRUCE JONES' HULK RUN
Incredible Hulk Vol. 2 #34 - #76 (January 2002 to October 2004)
The Incredible Hulk property was still struggling. John Byrne, Paul Jenkins, Sean McKeever, and other writers had failed to get any momentum going for Hulk (regardless of story quality). Then Bruce Jones (Bruce Banner and Rick Jones combined?!) comes along with an amazing idea: "Let's take the Hulk back to his Bill Bixby/Lou Ferrigno roots!"
The Hulk comic book becomes a wanderlust story with Bruce Banner "on the run" walking the lonely roads of Anywhere, USA. Banner wanders upon a small town with a problem that only Hulk can stop while being on the run from government agents. Bruce Jones would go on for a monumental run of 42 issues! Some truly magnificent artists would join Jones on this book such as Kaare Andrews, Lee Weeks, and including some of Mike Deodato Jr's best work in comics.
But there was one major problem with this run. Bruce Jones threw previous continuity out the window. If you knew nothing about the Hulk and were reading this section you'd be fine. If you knew anything about the Hulk's previous adventures you'd be scratching your head every issue and saying, "That's not right. That makes no sense. What are they doing?!"
Bruce Jones saved sales for the Hulk but made a MESS of the story. Marvel somehow convinced Peter David to return to the Hulk after Bruce Jones and basically had Peter David write a story to fix all the continuity problems created during Jones' run.
Yes, Bruce Jones made that much of a mess to where Marvel brought in another writer specifically to fix the problems.
To be fair, this run isn't too bad if viewed as "out of continuity."
#3
HULK: GRAY BY LOEB & SALE
Hulk: Gray is a six issue mini series that explored the earliest moments in the character's life, specifically the Hulk's earliest moments (not Bruce Banner's). Jeph Loeb and longtime collaborator and artist Tim Sale had produced two critically acclaimed comic books for Marvel, SPIDER-MAN: BLUE and DAREDEVIL: YELLOW. Hulk:Gray is the third of such stories and CAPTAIN AMERICA: WHITE is the last. Loeb and Sale produced some of their best work together at DC Comics with such essential Batman stories as BATMAN: DARK VICTORY and BATMAN: THE LONG HALLOWEEN. It seems whatever these two creators tackle together turned to gold.
The Gray Hulk is one of my most beloved aspects of the character. I was so intrigued with this idea of a different Hulk, not like the Green Hulk, but a Mister Hyde persona, darker, smart, and taking joy in making the villains suffer. From Stan Lee's very first Hulk issue through Peter David's epic development of the gray Hulk twenty years later, Gray Hulk has always been completely different from the simpleton Green Hulk. He's a smart and calculating jerk. But his abrasive personality really masks his feelings and insecurities. He's not actually a bad guy, he's just covering for the traumas he endured as a child.
Jeph Loeb misses everything about the Gray Hulk. EVERYTHING! Loeb's Gray Hulk is given the character of an even simpler Green Hulk, almost King Kong-like. Gray Hulk can barely speak in this series. It's like Jeph Loeb never read Stan Lee's Incredible Hulk #1 and never asked Peter David, "Hey fellow comics writer! What's the deal with Gray Hulk?" If this book was meant to explore Gray Hulk in greater detail and get to the core of his character, it failed spectacularly. Had it been the Green Hulk, which is the characterization Loeb is using, it would still fail because it is not representative of the Hulk at all in his earliest moments. Failure all around, folks!
But you know what, this actually is a very touching story. Loeb crafts a very beautiful story between Betty and Hulk. There's a scene with Hulk and Betty huddled together in a cave as it storms and rains outside. This scene would be recreated in the 2008 Marvel Studios film THE INCREDIBLE HULK. This moment, surprisingly, was lifted from a Stan Lee Hulk story in Tales to Astonish. Like some of the stories I already mentioned above, taken by itself without knowledge of any other Hulk story, Hulk: Gray is an endearing story.
But if you want to know specifically about Gray Hulk this story is a complete misnomer. Gray Hulk was nothing like this. If you want to know what Hulk was like in his very first outing this is not even close. All this story is good for is showcasing an example of Green Hulk's feelings toward Betty (but his skin is gray). And it's a good lesson is writing three dimensional characters. If you want to further your Hulk history and knowledge this book will only lead you astray.
#2
JASON AARON'S HULK RUN
Incredible Hulk Vol. 4 #1 - #15 (December 2011 to December 2012)
The first story I ever read from writer Jason Aaron was his Ghost Rider book for Marvel. I remember loving it and thinking it was one of the best books I was reading at the time (he brought back my second favorite Marvel character: Danny Ketch!). Then I read his book Wolverine: Weapon X and thought it was amazing too. I was even onboard for Wolverine Goes To Hell because I had been won over by the writer (and it had Johnny Blaze, Danny Ketch, and Daimon Hellstrom in it too!).
The prospect of Jason Aaron writing my number one favorite character was exciting! The reality was a horror I could've never imagined...
I hate this book.
I don't think I've hated a story on this list so far. But I truly despise this book.
This series continues after Greg Pak's INCREDIBLE HULKS #635, a story that brought about an understanding and integration between Banner and Hulk and reconnected Bruce, Hulk, and Betty. It was perhaps the last truly great Hulk era and Hulk story up to this point (Immortal Hulk currently is proving to be the next great Hulk story!). Hulk was in a really good place at the end of that series and I wished it wouldn't have ended. Any way you slice it, the next Hulk creative team had a hard act to follow.
Marc Silvestri started this new series with some truly breathtaking art. But he lasted literally two and half issues before having to be replaced. The art from then on went from bad to worse all the way to the end. The only thing worse than the artwork was the writing.
Jason Aaron begins his volume with Hulk sporting a beard (which if you've read HULK: THE END you'll know he'd never do). Then you find out Banner and Hulk were separated and Banner has become a homicidal maniac and stereotypical mad scientist. And Hulk and Betty have a fight and leave each other. In the very first story arc Jason Aaron destroys everything Greg Pak built over the course of his entire run! RIGHT OUT OF THE EFFING GATE THIS BOOK BOMBS! To top it off this story is a repeat of a classic Bill Mantlo story, nothing original or novel at all. At least when Greg Pak mirrored classic Hulk stories it was mainly for the benefit of the title character and building towards something greater. This first story arc ends with Hulk killing Banner. The next story arc reveals that Banner has been reintegrated with Hulk and the two are struggling for dominance, oh and Banner's still bat-crap crazy. Somehow Kraven the Hunter gets involved, Hulk goes to space to fight cyborg Russian cosmonaut Bears. And Dr. Doom factors in somehow. Not the Leader. Not Thunderbolt Ross. Dr. Doom, because he's such a classic Hulk villain, you know.
The only good thing about this volume were those two and half issues of Marc Silvestri artwork. That and the fact that it only lasted one year (which was WAY too long).
And just as Jason Aaron completely ignored everything the previous writer and writers had done before him, so too did the next writer, Mark Waid, ignore everything Jason Aaron did. SWEET JUSTICE! Well, not quite. Because Jason Aaron had messed up the Hulk's story so much, Mark Waid had to start from scratch, unable to build upon what Greg Pak had done prior. Greg Pak had set up Hulk for greatness and Jason Aaron ruined it for everybody.
I can't tell you how much I hate this story.
#1
THE RED HULK
Hulk Vol. 2 #1 - #24 (January 2008 to October 2010) I'm stopping it with Jeph Loeb's departure from the comic, but otherwise to the present...
I nearly lost my $#!+ talking about the last entry on the list. I go completely insane talking about this chart topper of a turd right here. Read as I lose my mind and rant about Red Hulk here --
TO RULK OR NOT TO RULK?
Jeph Loeb strikes again! Loeb also ruined Nova too by doing virtually the same freakin thing. Jeph Loeb, Brian Michael Bendis, and Jason Aaron...
STAY THE HELL AWAY FROM MY FAVORITE CHARACTERS!!!
You see? I lose all sanity when talking about this!
To boil it down, this volume was titled Hulk but it wasn't about Hulk. It was General Thunderbolt Ross. I don't like being lied to. The writing had an inconsistent tone which I still can't figure out (is it serious or is it funny? Is it supposed to be shocking or schlocking? Is it for adults or kids? Are you even trying, Loeb, or are you pulling a Bendis and just cashing a check? How can you write some of the most amazing Batman stories ever written but churn out the most spectacular garbage at Marvel?).
Calm... calm... 'ahem' Sorry, folks. Nearly lost it there.
At the very beginning of issue #1, right out of the gate, Loeb kills off my favorite Hulk villain, Abomination... with a gun. Hulk... using a gun...
I-- I'm sorry, folks. Just read
TO RULK OR NOT TO RULK? It's all there. The funny thing is, there are many people who love this story, who in fact love Red Hulk. I guess the word "love" is used loosely here. There are those who even clamor for Red Hulk to join the Marvel Cinematic Universe... To this I give a resounding NO!!
God, at least call him a different name... There are so many things wrong with General Ross going by Hulk, fundamentally wrong to the very core of General Ross' character. But does Jeph Loeb give a crap about character history, continuity, or the works of Stan Lee and Jack Kirby? Sure as hell doesn't seem like it.
Needless to say, when Marvel decided to pull this crap again with Hulk I said "I'm out!" I'm referring to THE TOTALLY AWESOME HULK volume where once again it wasn't Bruce Banner but someone else going by the name, Hulk. Fool me once, shame on you! Not falling for that crap again! I'm a completest, especially when it comes to Hulk. But Marvel burned me so bad with their Red Hulk crap that I didn't finish collecting that volume (the first Hulk volume I didn't complete!) and I said "No!" at the very first issue of Totally Awesome Hulk. I am NOT a Hulk Completest anymore!
DC Comics, please, I'm begging you, take Jeph Loeb and Jason Aaron. You've got Bendis (Thank you thank you thank you!). Do me one more solid and take Loeb and Aaron so they can't harm the Marvel Universe anymore... PLEASE!!!
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| Die! Die! Die, my darling! |
