BLOOD WORK: MARVEL CINEMATIC UNIVERSE: ETERNALS (2021)

MCU CHAPTER 30

I barely made it through writing the SHANG CHI review (my feelings have gotten worse towards that film, if you can believe that. Ask yourself, is Shang Chi actually heroic? Think about it). I just don't have the enthusiasm for the Marvel Cinematic Universe anymore. There are projects that still pique my curiosity here and there, but my faith and trust in the MCU has been shaken and it hasn't been repaired yet. Although, the second MORBIUS trailer has dropped (Sony Marvel as opposed to Disney Marvel) and it looks GREAT!

ETERNALS was, and remains I think, Marvel's biggest question mark. The trailers did no favors for this film, nor the marketing or promotion. If you thought Marvel Studios' films were designed to appeal to the lowest common denominator, Eternals achieves a new height by literally trying to appeal to absolutely everyone the world over (except actual comic book fans). Yet, in doing so, they've made a film for everyone and no one.

I'm gonna keep this review short (as short as I can) because I just don't have the drive for the MCU like I used to. SPOILERS AHEAD so beware.

THE PLOT

The Deviants, long thought extinct, have returned, prompting the Eternals to come out of hiding. Battles rage across the globe as Eternals are being targeted and killed by the Deviants. Meanwhile, a cryptic message from the Celestial, Arishim, warns the Eternals that their mission on Earth is nearing its end. Will the Eternals survive against the Deviants long enough to see the end of their mission? And what is the end of their mission exactly?

INITIAL REACTIONS

You know what? I actually enjoyed this movie! Specifically, I like how it deviates from the typical MCU feel and formula. I liked the cosmic elements and grand scope of the film. I feel this was reactionary though as I am so sick and tired of the standard MCU formula. That, and I haven't really enjoyed anything from Marvel Studios since ANT-MAN AND THE WASP (counting Spider-Man: No Way Home as a Sony Marvel film, so separate). I think I needed to know that something "different" was possible and seeing that was a sigh of relief.

As a whole the film tries to do way too much, so much that it can't really find its footing. The story is constantly jumping through the ages of time but only for a little bit. It feels like a six episode television series without the benefits of a six episode series, that being six hours of runtime to properly explore the time periods, places, ideas, and characters. There's just too much going on and not enough time dedicated to anything here. In this regard, it feels like a typical DC movie, not a Marvel movie (which may account for the different flavor this movie presents, but probably not in the way Marvel Studios had intended). As a result, nothing really stands out, either good or bad, because we just didn't get enough time with anything.

SPOILERS AHEAD!

However, there is one MAJOR issue I have with this film: IKARIS. Okay, I'm not the biggest Eternals comic book fan, but I do have some knowledge of them from the comics. Now, if there was one Eternal that stood out from the rest and was the "main" Eternal, it is Ikaris. Ikaris is the anchor and symbol of the Eternals, their greatest champion and stalwart hero. This movie turns him into a familicidal zealot. Luckily, I was forewarned of this ahead of time, otherwise I would've walked out of the theater saying, 'EFF THIS MOVIE!" It is still my most hated aspect of the film, made all the worse as it is completely unnecessary as the film already had a villain (which, in typical MCU fashion, they wasted and did nothing with). It is a major disservice to Jack Kirby's work and the comics, displaying yet again what Marvel Studios thinks of the comics and the fans.

I enjoyed both post-credits scenes immensely! Never did I ever think that I would see PIP THE TROLL in a movie, looking and acting comic accurate to perfection! Having Pip introduce STARFOX a.k.a. EROS (Thanos' brother) was pretty amazing. And I actually thought Harry Styles looked pretty good as Starfox as well. Then, during the second post-credits stinger, seeing Dane Whitman receive the Ebony Blade and then hearing the voice of the vampire hunter, BLADE, was pretty amazing too. These two stingers helped ease my feelings toward the pointless Ikaris turnabout and help me leave the theater feeling positive.

THE VERDICT

While I liked the movie, I think those feelings stem from the film feeling different than the rest, not necessarily because it was a good movie. I'm interested in watching this movie again, although this is another MCU film that I feel would strongly benefit from a longer "SNYDER CUT" style extended edition. I feel that way about the Thor films and a few of the Avengers films as well. I will say that I enjoyed this film far more than Shang Chi and Black Widow (admittedly not high bars to surpass), but this movie is far from the solid films of the MCU's distant past.

Eternals' concept is far more ambitious than what could be achieved in a single film under three hours. Eternals attempts to tell a Lord of the Rings sized epic, and all three LOTR films at that, in a single two and a half hour long film. Remember when the MCU used to take six films to introduce six characters? Well this film tries to introduce twelve characters in one movie! And we thought Marvel knew better...

Overall Ranking: 6 out of 10

It's not the worst of the MCU films, but it's close. That being said, it is refreshing to see a movie in the MCU break the formula. And for someone who is so sick of the "Formula," this alone was worth it. But with how Ikaris was portrayed, it makes me fear for what Marvel Studios will do with Adam Warlock and other favorites from the comics. Again, my faith in the MCU remains, as Gamora put it, "FAITHLESS."